Today has been hard. It has been really hard. The last post when I was smiling was because our agency had called and told us that the CCAA had agreed to issue our LOA the next week (last week). Our agency has been trying to get them to put it through because they are worried about Maggie’s health. She warned me that it may not happen but I couldn’t help but get my hopes up. I belong to a couple of online groups and no one has heard anything for the last few weeks. CCAA has not been issuing any PA’s, LOA’s or TA’s. I waited all week for the phone to ring and for our agencies number to appear. I checked my email every twenty minutes. But we heard nothing. Then on Friday and Saturday other parents started reporting that they had received their LOA’s. I was happy for them, many of them have waited much longer than we have, but each one made me cry for Maggie. Late Friday night I checked my email once more before going to bed and there was a message. It said that the CCAA director, who has to sign the LOA’s, was out of the office for part of last week and our LOA didn’t get signed. The CCAA said they would send it Monday and our agency was going to check up with them on Sunday night (Monday in China). So all day today I waited. More parents received their LOA’s today. And again for us… nothing.
We have been waiting for LOA for 69 days. We first saw Maggie’s picture 109 days ago. I know that many families have been waiting twice as long as we have for LOA. Many have been waiting even longer because they found their child before they even started the paperwork. But this wait is still so incredibly hard. I thought I was prepared for how long it may take, but I don’t think it is possible to prepare. Once we saw Maggie’s picture each day has just gotten longer and longer. I desperately want to be able to travel before the end of the year. Mainly because I just want Maggie in my arms and home for Christmas, but also because I want Merritt to be there with me. The farther into tax season it gets the harder it will be for him to leave. I really have felt very confident that we would be able to travel in time, but I have to admit I am starting to question that now. Please don’t remind me that it will all be in God’s time. I know that. I do. But it is still hard.
6 comments:
{HUGS} It's so hard waiting, especially when you have the expectation that you have...and each day feels like an eternity.
My prayers are with you, prayers of peace during this lonely time of waiting. Prayers that things move miraculously, and that you have Maggie in your arms before Christmas...and the health concerns are nothing major. Praying so hard for that....so very hard. {HUG}
Wish I had the words. I have yet to figure out the Lord's timing and I know sometimes you just need to vent. I know every minute takes faith, to keep waiting and believing. This is the stuff miracles are made of and yours is coming.
Mandee,
Hang in there! I totally remember how hard the wait was and my heart completely goes out to you. It can be down right painful. You and your family (especially Maggie)are in my thoughts and prayers. If you ever want to chat with someone who knows exactly how you're feeling or just vent feel free to email me at kjcolefamily@msn.com.
Hoping you hear something soon!
Jennie
Hi Mandee, So sorry. I am going stir crazy as well. Since our LOA we have waited 4 weeks to hear on the I800. After I800 we are told it will be another 4-6 weeks to get a TA...then add 4 more weeks to actually travel. Our hope for meeting our daughter before the end of the year is fading.
I sure hope some miracle happens and you can get your process expedited for her health! We will keep you in our prayers!
Dawn :)
I don't have any advice, but I do love you and feel for you and your family (which includes Maggie!!). It seems that little things all around me set me to thinking of you and your Maggie. Maybe that doesn't mean anything, but I shoose to believe it means there is magic in the air and it's swirling around you and Maggie and moving you closer to each other. It's like that movie "The Little Princess" when the two little girls imagine luxurious things and a gourmet breakfast and...! They wake up to find it a reality. It feels like that to me for you two.
Still praying. Still believing. Still here. Still love you. Still care.
Much Love,
Auty
Hugs to you, my darling. I had hoped you would get this as a nice birthday present. Love to you.
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