Why China?

We have had several people ask us why we chose China and a lot of people who want to give us there opinion on where we should go to instead. So I want to answer the question, "Why China?"

Adoption is actually something Merritt and I discussed before we were married. It was a natural conversation considering I have a niece that was adopted, Merritt has 3 siblings that were adopted, and at the time I was looking at going into social work and interested in the foster care system. So before we were even married we knew adoption could be an option for us if we ever needed to make that decision. When I went into the hospital before Sam was born and the doctor told us it could be our last pregnancy, we immediately started talking about adoption. I know that because we already felt strongly about adoption it helped us, me especially, cope with the tragedy we had to face. We already knew that our family was not yet done and that there were others ways our children could come to us. So as soon as Sam was born we immediately started discussing when and how we would start the process.

I didn't want our kids to be as far apart as I was from my sibling so when Sam was about 18 months I started researching and we ended up contacting LDS Family Services. That was the path that made sense. But as we tried to start the paperwork and tried to move forward it just didn't feel right. It was logical, it was cheaper, but it wasn't what we were supposed to do. I began researching every option--domestic and international. We decided on an international adoption. I did not like the idea of just waiting around hoping someone would eventually pick us. I wanted a little more control and somewhat of a timeline. I researched many, many countries--the pros and the cons. I was immediately drawn to the Asian countries and China in particular. I can not really say exactly what my initial draw was, I don't really remember. It was probably a combination of things (probably the fact that we would, with out a doubt, come home with a daughter). Whatever the initial reason Merritt and I both felt good about it and wanted to pursue it. Then I learned we both had to be 30. That was 3 years away and at the time the wait was 2 years after paper work was done. That meant Alex would be 10 and Sam would be 7 by the time our little girl came home. I hated the thought of having that many years between our children and returned to researching other countries. But we kept coming back to China and after many prayers we decided we needed to wait.

Most people dread turning 30, but I looked forward to that birthday. During those three years I continued to research different countries and agencies. We learned a little more about Taiwan adoptions and considered taking that path. We didn't have to be 30 but we still didn't feel the time was right. Finally this January when Merritt turned 30 I began to feel an urgency and we knew it was time to begin. I had learned a lot about adoption in different countries during our wait and we started second guessing ourselves. Things in China had changed and the wait was a lot longer (right now they are saying it could be 3 to 4 years, no one really knows). So again I started researching. We got really excited about some other possibilities--Taiwan, Colombia, and Kazakhstan. On paper they looked really good, especially Taiwan. The pros for Taiwan began to out way those of China and we tried to commit to that decision. But inside I still felt turmoil. After much fasting and much prayer we again decided on China. Even though on paper other options looked better and our chances of a faster adoption were greater, they just did not feel right.

It all comes down to this--Heavenly Father has guided us in this search for our next child. He has a plan for our family and China is part of the road that we must take. I know that there is a little girl that was meant to be part of our family and that Heavenly Father is leading us to her.